Josh and I are skipping all the Valentine’s Day rigamarole this year. Usually we don’t do much anyway apart from a card and maybe a little gift, but this year we’ve got so much going on that we decided we’d order a romantic pizza. Done.
Part of that is we have a biweekly group prenatal session at the birth center today. These have been pretty great; we’ve learned all about breastfeeding, stages of labor, SIDS prevention, etc. Today’s is a little different; while the women will be doing bellycasting (a little hippy dippy for my tastes but I am going with the flow), the dads/partners go off and do something called “Partner Boot Camp,” where they learn to do things like change diapers and swaddle infants and all that. I imagine, knowing our birth center (which also a community health center), that they also get a pep talk about being there for their growing families, being a good partner, etc etc.
So I got a call earlier this week from the group care coordinator, just wanting to see if my partner would be coming to session this week for this.
What I said: “Yes, he’ll be there!”
What I wanted to say: “My husband has been to almost every session that we’ve had so far! He’s consistently the only man in the room! My favorite moment every two weeks is when he is there during the checkup and I get to see his face light up as we listen to the baby’s heartbeat! He is amazing and I don’t know what I’d do without him!”
I am so lucky, and I know it. I don’t want to judge other folks whose partners can’t be at every single prenatal session; these take a big chunk out of the day and it’s hard to get away. But when I think about how present Josh has been in this whole process, how much slack he’s picked up around the house and just generally as I wrestle with all the physical changes this pregnancy brings, how much patience he’s had with me when hormones lead to some crazy emotional places, I thank my lucky stars that the man I married is truly a partner, in this and in everything. And he makes me laugh. What more could I ask for? He’s reading the baby books and taking notes*!
So, on this Valentine’s Day, I just want to shout from the Blog Rooftops how grateful I am for my husband, and how much I love him. And I hope I remember to look back on this post in a couple months when I’m sleep-deprived and my fuse is short, to remind myself that the two of us are in this together, that I have a husband who will never refer to himself as “babysitting” our child, and that he’s gotten me through some of the hardest parts of this pregnancy like a hero.
*Book rec for anyone who finds it applicable: The Birth Partner by Penny Simkin. Ostensibly for Josh but I read it too. Really helpful info.